The Leaving: Hope for a Mama's Heart

It's an unspoken mommy truth: one day they will leave.

This baby in your arms that you have waited on, prayed for, dreamed of, will one day drive away into their own dreams.

And so we push that truth down and blink away tears and keep that little unspoken dammed up behind our mommy wall so we can live the day.

Not because we wish it away or believe we can delay it, but simply because the thought of living without your heart seems paralyzingly impossible.

When they seek you out for a hug, advice, snuggles, quality time...the unspoken flashes before you, and you linger in that moment to help stand on your feet in the soon to come.

But how did we even get here? How are these little feet even walking, running, driving, going out into this big world without us holding those stubby little fingers in ours?

How did time sneak up on us?

No one tells you in those endless, sleepless nights of vomit and nightmares that it is inching closer. 

No one tells you in the sibling squabbles and slamming doors that it's closing in on the horizon.

When we wish any of it away, we move past the very moments that unite us in the days beyond the leaving. 

Every ache, every tear, every fight, every stumble are opportunities for roots to dig deeper, so they can fly higher.

Every laugh, every accolade, every face to face moment, every I love you, wire us for a lifetime of connection that distance cannot undo.

So yes, our hearts will ache with love and pride that swell as they stand up in who they are, this grown up human they are destined to be. 

And yes, that unspoken truth behind that wall in the depths of our mama hearts may even burst and result in a massive flood of tears and emotion.

But it isn't because we haven't known it was coming- it's because we didn't see how quickly it was approaching. 

Mommies know their babies will leave.

But we breathe deep because our babies know the truth we have been imprinting on their hearts every moment before this leaving one: they can always come back. 

Your baby may walk out of your door, they can never walk out of your heart.

Release the leaving and hold onto that mommy truth. 

#SimpleTruth 

Spit and Mud to Heal My Mess

Spit and mud: Jesus uses it in John 9. Seriously. 

And for what? A miracle. 

Jesus sees the blindness-this mans point of need- and meets him there with spit and mud. 

Sometimes I get mad about an area of "blindness" in my life- places in need of His miraculous. I get bitter in my blindness. I don't understand why I have to live life saddled with physical frustrations and impairments...storms camped out over me spiritually, emotionally, situationally, relationally. 

But then when JESUS approaches my need with spit and mud...I lament over messy methods and delay or even miss my miracle. 

When asked about this man's blindness Jesus simply says this: "...but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life."(John 9:3) 

What if I took this approach, had this mentality toward every occurrence and every area of my life?

What if I lived with that level of pure, simple confidence that Jesus WILL display His glory through the miraculous in my life...even if His intervention is unconventional by my standards? (see spit, mud and a face washing!) 

Will I embrace spit and mud from the Master in order to see my miracle? 

I'm blind in so many ways. But I know God has a plan for His glory in it all if I will just surrender to His process. 

I don't love the method every time...but I love and trust the Master. 

And that is enough for me. 

I'm praying you embrace the spit and mud, too. 

~Julie 

#simpletruth #first5 @first5 @proverbs31

A Posture of Grace

John 8 begins with a bang. 

An adulterous woman, caught in the act. I know many of us recognize sin in our life- but how many of us can say that the thing or things we are most ashamed about, we have actually been caught in the very act of doing, and then had it announced in the town square before religious leaders?! 

Let that sink in a fat minute. 

This is a for real moment in this woman's life. As in- how do you even stand up under the weight of all that shame? But they stood her before Jesus and her community and declared her sin for all to see. 

What strikes me is what Jesus does: he stoops low. He bends down. 

He took the posture of Grace. 

Philippians 2 reminds us of that:

“And after He had appeared in human form, He abased and humbled Himself [still further] and carried His obedience to the extreme of death, even the death of the cross! Therefore [because He stooped so low] God has highly exalted Him and has freely bestowed on Him the name that is above every name,”

Philippians 2:8-9 AMP

He lowered himself so she could stand in the midst of her accusers. 

And that is what the cross and empty grave have done for you and me. 

All her accusers dropped their stones and walked away, "...until only Jesus was left with the woman, standing there."(John 8:9) 

Only Jesus. Alone in His presence. That's when you see the truth of who He is and who you are in His eyes.  

I'm afraid that as soon as the stones fell, I would have run away in shame, bearing the weight of the condemnation that brought me to that place. 

But she remained...and in doing so let Jesus declare the opportunity for new life over her.

"...And Jesus said, I do not condemn you either. Go on your way and from now on sin no more." John 8:11

In the same place they declared her sin and shame, JESUS declared her righteous through His grace. 

When I am accused, when I am judged- right or wrongly- how do I respond? 

Do I run from Him or to Him? 

Do I dare remain as this woman did and glimpse this unconditional Love? 

Am I willing to position myself to receive grace from the One who is postured to issue it? 

Only then can I step into who HE says I am- when I allow His declaration of truth to redeem me. 

Jesus disarmed her accusers to arm her for LIFE. 

That is the power of Grace. 

Let that marinate in you so it can pour out through you in every place you enter. 

Let's position ourselves for Grace, but let's take a posture of Grace in our lives so that others can see this crazy love of Jesus. 

I am asking the Holy Spirit to help me embrace it AND live it. 

That's my prayer for you today, too. ~Julie 

#simpletruth 

@first5 #first5 @proverbs31

The Most Important Thing About You

"What comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thing about us."- Tozer

Jesus is polarizing. John 7 reveals that. Verse 43 tells us people were divided because of him. 

Why? Because what we believe about Him is the most important thing about us. 

It determines if we live FOR or if we live FROM. 

We live FOR our thirst to be quenched or we live FROM the Thirst Quencher. 

We live FOR righteousness or we live FROM His Righteousness. 

We live FOR victory or we live FROM His victory. 

We live FOR satisfaction or FROM our satisfaction in HIM. 

We live FOR love or we live FROM His perfect love. 

Jesus says in verse 38, "Whoever believes in me as the Scripture has said, streams of living water will flow FROM within him." (my emphasis added) 

FROM is inside-out living. FOR is outside-in.

FROM is transformational. FOR is temporary.

FROM is grace filled. FOR is effort filled. 

FROM is empowering. FOR is draining. 

FROM is focused. FOR is afraid. 

In every part of our lives we are choosing to live FOR or to live FROM. 

I am asking God to show me where I've chosen FOR...asking Him to rearrange and add to those letters to help me live FROM. 

That's my prayer for you today, too.

~Julie 

#simpletruth @first5app @proverbs31ministries #first5 

When Reality is Rough

*** I am currently walking through the book of John with Proverbs31 ministries using the First 5 App. 

This post is part of what the Holy Spirit is teaching me and revealing to me personally as I dig into this part of His Word. 

Jump into this study with me by going to www.first5.org or downloading the app for your device.***

John 6: Jesus feeds the five thousand; Jesus walks on water. 

This chapter is full of miracles but it's also full of moments that can sometimes get glossed over because of their magnitude. I can't help but think about the people IN those moments, witnessing those miracles. These were real problems, real hunger, real storms, real fear, real questions, real uncertainty. Those stories we read and summarize and throw into sentences were their realities. 

And when you are in the middle of your reality, believing for a miracle isn't as easy as reading ahead a few verses- because when it's YOUR reality, you can't read past the verse you're in; you can only believe that Jesus has already perfectly written it. 

So today it's taking everything I have to put my pen down and let Jesus write the miraculous in the current reality of my life verses. Instead of pining over all the drafts cluttering my mind and my soul, I am using every ounce of who I am to draw close to the Author and Perfector of my faith. 

I can be like Philip who could not see the way so decided it was impossible, or be like Andrew who even though he didn't see how, chose to go to Jesus and surrender what they had. 

What I have today doesn't feel like a lot, or look like a lot, but Jesus is my abundance. He is the Multiplier. He is the Miracle Worker. He is the Way Maker. He is the Storm Calmer. 

I'm inviting Jesus into my reality. He's already written the miracle- I just have to surrender the pen and believe the Author. 

That's my prayer for you, too.

~Julie 

Perfect Love

There's nothing I can do to make Jesus love me less, and there's nothing I can do to make Him love me more. 

He loves me perfectly. 

This is Grace truth The Holy Spirit stitched into this sinner's heart years ago. But I often revisit it...run my fingers across those words to remind my weary soul. 

And I repeat to myself: 

I don't have to BE perfect for Jesus to love me perfectly. 

At times like this that I just have to journal it to remind myself- to make it sink deep, because some days, some seasons, the world screams at me-this mama, wife, daughter, sister, pastor's wife, teacher, worship leader, writer- yes, the world screams the exact opposite at every turn. 

I am tempted to fall in love with working towards some false perfection rather than His Perfect Love.

But JESUS.

Hebrews 12 tells me that JESUS is the Author AND Perfecter of my faith. 

When I look Grace in the face, I am undone. 

When I am enveloped in the embrace of my Savior, my walls fall. 

When I am positioned at His feet, 

I am not driven to DO; I am driven to LOVE.

I cannot hold back or hold in what He has done for me. 

When I live from His love and not for it, I am FREE to truly love. 

 

Hey Do-er? Breathe deeply. 

Every single bit of His love, grace, and forgiveness is available to you right in the middle of your mess and your crazy. Let's change our cry from "If God..." to the truth declaration: God IS! 

God is for you. 

God is with you. 

God is love. 

God is enough. 

He loves us perfectly, even though we are far from it. 

Find rest and JOY and POWER in that truth today. 

You are SO loved. 

Hebrews 12:2

"We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne."

Romans 5:8

"But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners." 

When You Are GIVE.SLAP.OUT.

I hear the voice screaming:

"Give in! Give up!"

Why? Because I'm 

GIVE.SLAP.OUT.

Who's been there? Who is there? I know we all need to raise our hands on this one. 

From endless demands, to overloaded schedules, to impossible requirements...and the list goes on. 

We want to stop the crazy but we don't know how. We want to escape the hard because we have failed to bring the change we want to see. 

But you and I? 

We have a choice. 

Just because that voice is screaming, it doesn't mean its message is TRUTH. 

You and I? 

We can choose to stand up under that lie...that temptation to RUN FOR THE EVER LOVIN' HILLS. 

Because JESUS...He's been there. 

And JESUS? 

He's got a trade for you: 
Your heavy burden for His fullness of Joy- right smack dab in the middle of whatever crazy you're in. 

He wants to carry that weight. 

He has been tempted and has walked through it perfectly...so you don't have to crumble trying to.

Don't give in my friend. 

Don't give up.

GIVE IT OVER to God. 

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” 

Matthew 11:28-30

"This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin. So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most." 

Hebrews 4:15-16