For My Poplar Springs Family

Words seem so small when you are trying to express such an expanse of time, emotions looming large and memories so deep.

But still, some words need to be spoken, not just assumed…because these moments and days long for them like salve for the hurting and confused and fearful soul that is walking down this unknown and uncomfortable path. 

Both for the soul staying and the soul leaving. 

So this is my heart.

Friend to friend, family member to family member, life to life.

To you…from me.

To all those who watched us, young and naive, on that stage- young in love and diving into life together- engaged and stepping forward into life together: thank you for believing in us, supporting us. 

Thank you for walking us through the newly wed years that quickly turned into parenting years! 

For helping us walk through ministry with little ones that jus kept coming summer after summer it seemed! Lol! 

We could not have done it without your willingness to pray for us, babysit for us, embrace us in every way that 20 somethings need when they think they have a clue but don’t. 

Your grace was our hope and success.

Thank you.

To the church staff and leadership: Thank you for giving my husband the opportunity to walk out the call of God on his life. 

In the good and the hard times through these many years, we know God was sovereignly shaping the very things He needed in us so that we could step out into His call even now. 

We thank you for being a part of the process of growth. 

I pray that the Spirit’s fire is ignited in each of you like never before, all for the glory of our amazing God. 

May you look full into His wonderful face and see the person of Grace like never before.

May you breathe compassion for the broken, forgiveness for the fallen, and passion for the Lord.

May the His Kingdom be your focus, and His Holy Spirit your guiding voice above all the noise.

I love you in the Lord. 

To all those parents through the years and even now who saw what God was doing in spite of who we were and are and entrusted your teenagers, your children to our ministry: thank you for believing in us. 

We know we never got it perfect, and we got it wrong a lot, but we have always loved. 

Thank you for letting us love on your most precious gifts. 

Know that every choice we made was for one purpose: to bring a generation closer to the very heart of God. 

Water those seeds every second you get.

To all my church Mamas- and you know who you are- I cannot even type without tears.

You have prayed for me, loved me, supported me, cheered for me, kept me focused like no others. 

You taught me to be proud to stand up in the calling on my life as a mother, unashamed of who He has created me to be. 

It is because of you that I was able to step out into His call for me to homeschool my children. 

I looked for your faces on those Sunday mornings that I wanted to be in bed with the covers over my head, stuck in my pity parties. 

Yes, it was your smiles and hugs that reminded me of the Father’s love and energized me to run after His presence instead of sit down in my circumstance. 

It is my turn now. 

I promise to make you proud. 

Thank you for teaching me how to love this way: full of mama grace.

To the teachers, adults, mentors who have poured Jesus into my children: I cannot even begin to tell you what you mean to me. You have pointed my children to Jesus Sunday after Sunday, year after year. 

You have encouraged them, taught them, cried with them, held them, rocked them as babies, guided them as teens, run and played with them as children, wiped their tears, kissed their boo-boos, watched them take first steps, come to Jesus, be dedicated to Him, and discipled them in ways that a mama and daddy just can’t sometimes. You have had eternal influence in their lives! I know that I never said thank you enough. I appreciate your obedience to serve so much. 

Never doubt that what you do makes a difference! 

To my choir comrades: you will never know the privilege it has been to praise with you, laugh with you, learn with you. 

Thank you for trusting this far from expert to lead you into the Throne room with my out of the box ways. 

Standing in front of you watching you catch fire with the light from His face was my great joy and it is emblazoned into my soul. 

From Easter productions to concerts, to practices, there are memories that I will cherish for a lifetime and on into eternity. 

Pursue His presence above all else my friends. 

The veil is torn…praise your way to His feet with every breath, every note. 

The sound from that place will pierce the atmosphere. 

I love you each one of you.

To the children who sang, acted, and danced their hearts out for me through the years: I love your sweet little faces. I have loved acting like a goofball with you and for you. 

You always rose to every outrageous expectation. 

You are the picture of worshipping with abandon: No pretension, no apprehension…just pure praise. 

I loved every second. 

And to you ladies that were on that journey with me…wow what a team. Even in the stress there was unspeakable joy. 

Sing on. Dance on. Act on. Carry on. 

Keep calm and Sing Praise. :)

To the "other half of my brain"-you know who you are: there will never, ever be another you. (I can’t see through the ugly cry to type any more.)

To our fellow local, world travelers through the years-from camping to white water rafting, to camps, to the Dominican Republic, to Nicaragua, to Alaskan Wilderness: what MEMORIES! 

I smile at the thought of each journey. 

God sculpted so much in our lives through these days and weeks. 

Experiences cannot be recreated, but their lessons can be lived out. 

And that is my prayer. 

Whether it was how to love, how to have deeper friendships, how to laugh in the face of frustration and the unexpected, how to walk in faith and trust, how to simply slow down and enjoy life, how to share space, how to push through exhaustion, how to change a thousand flat tires, how to speak loud the name of Jesus even when they don’t speak your language, how to live to the fullest right where you are…that is what I am asking the Holy Spirit to overflow in your life. 

May those experiences nourish you and whet your appetite for more just like it in the days ahead.

To my Sunday School 10th graders through the years: that hour each Sunday has forever impacted my life. 

You challenged me to step way outside the box and listen to the Holy Spirit in ways I had not before so that I could reveal His Words and His Life to you. 

From fireworks in the back parking lot, to plantings in the church yard, to balloons, and games and my passionate rants…you followed me. I learned from you to open up my life in a way I hadn’t before. 

And I bet you know what I am gonna say: This is your critical year. Take PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY for your relationship with Jesus. Remember that the ONLY truth in this world is God’s Word; everything else is just an opinion. 

It is all about relationship, not religion. 

Fall in love with Jesus…and let the WORLD know. 

You are world changers.

To the Lifesource band who trusted me in the craziest of ways: I love you guys. 

Even when I know I drove you crazy, you still jumped headfirst with me into the presence of God. 

Every note we played together, every moment we worshipped together is so precious to me.

Thank you for trusting my heart to lead those students past going through the motions and challenge them to press in to deep places of genuine worship. 

That alone has been the desire of my heart, and will forever be my prayer for you and for them. 

My prayer is that performance and platform will never take precedence over the passion for His presence.

To the Sunday morning smilers…the ones who engaged with me from that stage, who followed me into His presence and let freedom reign in them through worship:Thank you. 

You may or may not even know who you are…but I do. 

And you reminded me why I had that microphone in my hand. 

It has never been about being heard. It has always been and will always been about making Him known. 

Seeing your willingness to hear HIM and respond unashamed is so beautiful. 

Keep going to that beautiful place, unashamed. 

You never know who you are encouraging with your boldness and purity of worship.

To our Bootcamp buddies: we have enjoyed living out a lifestyle of health with you! Thanks for always making it fun and working hard! We pray that you still go after inside out health as you walk through life! You can do ALL things through Christ! And to you plank, rep, and/or movement cheaters…you know who you are…you can hear me yelling!  Every rep counts! Love you guys! :)

To the students we have done life with, laughed with, cried with, text with, snap chatted with, pranked with, danced with, dressed up with, traveled with: what a fabulous journey you have made this for us. 19 years has left us with generations of children, now in all stages of life. You all will never know that joy we have in seeing you grow in life, but most of all, fall in love with Jesus. 

That will forever be our heart for you. 

No wee hours of the night will ever be too late or too early for you to reach out for us…we are always here for you.

We are so proud of you.

So. proud.

Remember the more you seek Him, the more you find Him.

He is not done with you.

Stand with arms high and heart abandoned.

He has EVERYTHING you need.

I love each and every one of you so. stinkin’. much.

To my fellow Homeschooling mamas: you are an answer to prayer! 

You have walked through so much with me. 

And I am so thankful to have friends who understand the reality and blessing of this journey. 

Being able to worship with you has been an added bonus! :) 

We will have a Bella night soon! Know I am always here for you!

To my Sisterhood friends: 11 years of all in for Jesus with you has produced fruit that none of us can fully recount. 

You filled my spirit with a sister kind of love that is so extraordinary. 

Thank you for giving me the privilege of pouring out Jesus to you year after year. 

Thank you for holding me accountable and loving me through my mess…God is not finished with us yet my friends!!!

To our family friends and "we do life with you" friends: there will forever be coffee nights, and skiing, and Twin Palmetto, and camping, and group texts, and blessing ceremonies, and games, and New Years Eve, and concerts, and sleepovers, and movies, and birthdays, and workouts, and…and...life. 

God just anoints friendships sometimes in ways we can’t explain.

You showed me that it isn’t the "minister’s family" against the world…a lesson I needed to learn. 

You made me brave. 

You helped me tear down walls I had built in my heart that I for so long never knew were there.

You gave me courage to trust God with my heart and love people for real, and that every now and then, you get this crazy amazing blessing of them loving you back with a Jesus kind of unconditional love. 

We are forever friends…and I am forever thankful.

To our Poplar Springs family as a whole: leaving you is the hardest thing we have ever done. 

But we love you all so much that we know we must go.

When God calls us to obey, we know that we have to follow. 

If we did not, we would not only hurt ourselves, but we would also be ultimately hurting the very ones we love so dearly, the very ones that make leaving so hard to do.

I am still grieving, still weeping through it all, because stepping out of the boat is scary and huge and lonely and the ocean seems like its going to swallow me up some days. 

So never think that for a moment that this is easy or trite or that we do not understand your pain and sadness , because we do. 

And know we are praying you through it.

But here is true beauty in it all: we may not be under the same roof on a given Sunday morning, but we are all on the same team.

We have the same Father. 

And nothing can change that.

Let’s choose to remember we are united in Christ for Kingdom purpose.

Let’s choose to break molds and stereotypes and be people that cheer our team members on as we all, individually and corporately in all different kinds of ways, live out loud for Jesus and go hard after making His Kingdom a reality here on this earth.

Make your mark on this world for Jesus, Poplar Springs.

I am cheering for you.

I always will be.

Your fingerprints are all over my life, the life of my family.

And I am forever grateful.

All my love.

For His Glory,

Julie P. McNeely

 

 

Be Still

"Be still, and know that I am God. 

I will be exalted among the nations, 

I will be exalted in the earth!"

(Psalm 46:10 ESV)

I need to give you a tiny bit of back-story on how this verse and how the picture to your right changed my life...so roll with me on this...

When I was 19 years old, I truly began investing in my relationship with the One who had invested everything in me.
I craved time with Him, to know Him more and to understand His desires for me. 
During that time I began to pray for the Lord to give me a life verse- a verse that I could stand on throughout my life, and hold to that specific treasure that He had given me to remind me that, with Him, my account is never depleted or overdrawn. :)
Shortly after, the Lord gave me Psalm 46:10.
 I am sure that you may have heard it or heard it referenced, or maybe at least the "Be still..." part.
Over the years it has been such water to my Spirit, such refreshing to my soul. From time to time, I'll revisit it the verse to study and find out what God wants to show me fresh and new.

One day, several years ago, as I did this, I decided to look up the verse in different translations of the Bible in order to study and gain fuller understanding.
As I did, read the New American Standard Bible version.
I have to be honest, at first reading, I had a major, "Huh?" moment:

"Cease striving and know that I am God;

I will be exalted among the nations,

I will be exalted in the earth."

(Psalm 46:10 NASB)

 "Cease striving..." ???
My perfectionist, people pleaser, affirmation seeker conversation with the Lord went something like this...

"Cease striving? What Lord? You mean, you want me to stop trying? You want me to stop doing, stop seeking ways to be better for you, stop trying to do great things for you? But I thought that was what you wanted for me: To be the best I could be?!?  If I "cease striving" then I will stop growing....right?"

See, the problem was, I was looking at the word "striving" the wrong way. 
In our culture, and more importantly in my follow the rules, all or nothing, give it all you got mind,  it's more commonly synonymous with "aspiring" or carries the connotation of  "goal-setting".

But when I looked up "striving" in the dictionary, this is what I found:
To struggle vigorously, as in opposition or resistance 
To exert oneself vigorously; to try hard
To make strenuous efforts toward any goal
To contend in opposition, battle or any conflict; compete

What I saw as solid and steady effort from myself, God saw as pointless struggle and strain, that ultimately only brought one result: frustration.

Why?
Because it was MY strength, MY efforts, MY ideas, MY goals, MY, MY, MY!

Immediately the Lord gave me a vision of this verse: A Chinese finger trap.
You know...that thing that you put one finger in each side and when you pull to get your fingers out, they are stuck.(see picture at top)
Although its just your fingers, there is something about it that brings about panic...and make your fingers feel claustrophobic(if that's possible!).
Once your fingers are in, and you keep pulling and struggling against the trap, the fact is...you are not going to get out.
You are stuck.
Trapped.
And no matter how hard you try and try and pull and pull, panic sets in as you realize, you cannot get out.

How do you overcome this little trap of a toy?

You stop...Relax...."cease striving"... And then, slowly pull out one finger, then the other.
The result? Freedom.

The Lord used the vision of this little toy to reveal to me a core truth of this verse I had been missing:
All too often, I get too consumed with struggling to put forth the best that I can give when the best thing for me to do is REST in the perfection that He is!

The Lord is saying "Yes, I want YOU to stop trying, YOU to stop struggling, YOU to stop putting forth strenuous effort, YOU to stop contending...and let ME do the work IN YOU and THROUGH YOU!"

Cease striving.

It's how you go from good things to GOD things.
It's how you go from your best to HIS best. 
HIS strength, HIS effort, HIS ideas, HIS goals...

Cease striving.

Whatever you are going through, in the hands of the Almighty God...the God that is exalted above all the nations...it is merely a little wicker toy of a trap over which He has already secured the victory! 

I am still learning to live this truth day in and day out, but when I allow it to permeate my spirit, it transforms my attitude, my choices, my outlook, my emotions...even my health.

The effort I need to make is simply this:
BE STILL. 
Be His.

"God will fight the battle for you. And you? You keep your mouths shut!"

(Exodus 14:14 MSG)

Share His Truth...Tweet or post this today:
Don't b consumed w/ struggling 2 b YOUR best...REST in the perfection that HE is! #psalm4610 #forHisglory

9/11 Remembering What I Felt...

I usually don't remember a lot about how I felt on any particular day.
Maybe what I experienced, but rarely the specifics of what I felt.

But then, something happens that sears a feeling into your core, into your mind, into your memory....and thats what happened on September 11, 2001.

I have always remembered what happened that day, what I was doing...but I don't aways let or allow myself remember what I felt...to go to that tender place in my memories.

This year, as I was doing a unit study about the events of that day in our Homeschool, I thought about getting out my journal from that time to see if it might help convey my heart during that time to my children.
I had never re-read what I wrote.
But when I did, it brought back not just memories, but deep seated feelings that had flooded over me that September 10 years ago, as a 24 year old wife, mother of 2 (at the time), seeking my place and way in the world and His Kingdom...

What follows is that journal entry from Friday, September 14, 2011...my first after the attacks:

"I have so much sadness inside of me...I just don't know how to let it out.
I feel at times as though I could cry for days, other times I just want to scream, others times I could do it all at once.
Our nation has been attacked...but more than that, our spirits have taken a blow.
I keep taking deep breaths to try to get it all out, and it just can't reach deep enough.
This is affecting me in a way I just cannot explain.
And I know that it has only just begun!
God show me, reveal to me what it is that You want me to know, what it is You want me to do!
How do You want me to change?
How do You what me to react?
Right now I am scared.
I am sad.
I am mad.
I am overwhelmed.
I am so many things that I can't put into words.
But I feel them.
I definitely feel them.
I am drawn to the stories and the pictures. I can't pull myself away.
I sing constantly in my mind. I feel like it's the only way to push through...I feel like I can get it out that way.
The words that flow from my mouth comfort my heart and my mind.
Thank you Lord for song, for words that can be lifted to You in praise, in longing, in thanksgiving.
You restore me through the gift you've bestowed on me.
How precious, how priceless.
Your love is so great!
I know Your arms are all around me.
You call me to Your lap to sit for a while and I settle in the comfort of Your never-ending, ever reaching, constant and healing love.
Thank you Jesus for holding me for more than just a little while.
Thank you for understanding that it feels so hard to smile.
The emptiness that seems to grow is something that only you can touch...with You only will it fade.
I praise You Lord for Your comfort.
Thank You for healing and caring about my fears.
Jesus, please help me to hold You through them, to know that You are greater and stronger than anything I could ever encounter.
God, please show me- clearly and surely- what You want FROM me, what You want FOR me!
Speak to me loudly and clearly, Jesus!
I want to know You more!
Use me Jesus!
Amen."

So on this tenth anniversary, I will remember.
I will remember what happened that day...what I felt that day...what others may have felt and experienced...
I will remember what the Lord planted in my spirit that day and I will nurture it further so that the life and fruit He desired to see in me as a result of it all will be evident...so it will bring Him glory...so it will make Him obvious!

I flipped back a page and saw the last pre-9/11 journal entry:

"Be open! Sometimes God doesn't change your circumstances; He changes you!!"

Wow.
Choose to remember how you felt that crisp blue-skied day of Septmeber 11, 2001... and let it fuel your passion to press into the Lord and go forward with a battle cry to further His Kingdom in the face of whatever may be on your horizon!
And I will never take for granted the opportunity to do so.

Yes, I will remember.

 Spread His Word, Tweet/Post this:
#IWillRemember #IWillMakeGodObvious #911