When You Are GIVE.SLAP.OUT.

I hear the voice screaming:

"Give in! Give up!"

Why? Because I'm 

GIVE.SLAP.OUT.

Who's been there? Who is there? I know we all need to raise our hands on this one. 

From endless demands, to overloaded schedules, to impossible requirements...and the list goes on. 

We want to stop the crazy but we don't know how. We want to escape the hard because we have failed to bring the change we want to see. 

But you and I? 

We have a choice. 

Just because that voice is screaming, it doesn't mean its message is TRUTH. 

You and I? 

We can choose to stand up under that lie...that temptation to RUN FOR THE EVER LOVIN' HILLS. 

Because JESUS...He's been there. 

And JESUS? 

He's got a trade for you: 
Your heavy burden for His fullness of Joy- right smack dab in the middle of whatever crazy you're in. 

He wants to carry that weight. 

He has been tempted and has walked through it perfectly...so you don't have to crumble trying to.

Don't give in my friend. 

Don't give up.

GIVE IT OVER to God. 

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” 

Matthew 11:28-30

"This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin. So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most." 

Hebrews 4:15-16

Scandalous

Sometimes is is easier to pretend than to be real.
It's easier for me to pretend that I am ok.
To pretend I am not racked with
hurt
jealousy
fear
bitterness
confusion
insufficiencies
doubt
failure
frustration
and the list goes on...

Because doesn't fake live longer?
I mean, like,  forever?
Doesn't the artificial end up superior in the race for longevity?
It is plastic and perfect, streamlined and efficient.

From Barbie in the dream house to the nails on my fingertips to the fruit in the coffee table bowl.

And there are days I want that.
All. of. That.

I want the plastic existence.
I want to pretend.
I put forward the artificial.
Because it feels like perfection.
It feels like it.

Plastic doesn't yell at her kids and escape by letting them linger on their devices all day.
Mrs. Pretender doesn't ever cry herself to sleep, isn't consumed by fear.
Artificial doesn't get angry at the world and circumstances.
Perfection.
*eye roll*

But the fruit in the bowl?
I notice it's dusty.
Untouched. Unused.
A pre-relic with no purpose.

Barbie?
Someone has to create her life for her.
She doesn't even have the power to move, to breathe.
She cannot reproduce life...she cannot even live it.

And these french tips?
They can't grow. They just cover up the real thing.

So what's missing?
Life. Real life.
The plastic, the perfect, is only offering us a deceptive invitation to imitation.

And so we RSVP because the pretending and the plastic seems to hurt so much less...at least in public, anyway.

The artificial doesn't have to feel all that fear and pain and hurt...right?
But it also never has the opportunity to heal...
to love,
to grow,
to reproduce the beauty that makes this world worth waking up to,
to find purpose and to go hard and fast in the direction of her dreams.

It's true: fake may last longer. But it doesn't actually live.

So today, I am ripping up piled high stationery on the desk of my life.
All those invitations that beckon me to dress up and put on my best appearance, plastic performance.
All those masquerade balls that want me to exist in artificial anonymity so that others aren't inconvenienced by my imperfections- my living.
I. am. shredding. them. ALL.

Because we all have one ultimate choice to make:
imitate life
or
live it.

Me? I choose Grace. Scandalous Grace.
It is the only way I will ever truly live.

What do you choose?

John 1:16

"For from His fullness we have all received grace upon grace."

John 10:10

"The thief comes only to steal kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly."

Listen and worship to these words of worship by Hillsong United

#GraceLife
#SimpleTruth

Assuming the Normal...blah, blah, blah.

It was a normal, routine night in our household. Quiet had began to blanket the rooms with the sleepiness of bedtime while Jarrett and I step into our respective roles, as if on autopilot. Everyone had been gearing down for the night by reading in bed, some willingly, some...not so much.
I went to Jonathan to give him his arms-out-from-under-the-cover hug and hand squeezes goodnight. But, I had a sense he wanted me to linger. As I stood up to tell him goodnight and that I love him, I saw for sure in his eyes thoughts that longed to climb out, words that needed to be said.
"What is it buddy?" I asked, expecting the typical conversation of waking up and wondering if it's ok for him to come get me.
I assumed too little.
He broke his silence, "Mama, I started reading that book Who Is John F. Kennedy?."
"That's good!", I said to my non-lover of reading, a little surprised by the brevity of the statement and wondering if there was more.
I rubbed his back a little more and then he rolled over and looked up at me seriously and urgently.
"Mama", he said through 11 year old efforts to disguise a voice beginning to quiver, "in that book it was saying how his mom was never really there for him because she would go on these fashion trips and visit Europe all the time and stuff."
"Oh that's sad." I interrupted, poised to pounce on this teachable moment that presented itself.
He quickly stopped me from rambling with that thought.
"Yeah I know, I know...and it just got me to thinkin'... It got me to thinkin how you are ALWAYS there for me...and...and...", through tears he continued, "I just wanna say thank you. I love you, Mama."

Speechless.

I fumbled through the flood of tears in my throat, "Jonathan, you just filled my heart full buddy. I love you....and I wouldn't miss a second."

To think, I could've missed that moment because I was too stuck in going through the motions, of walking zombie like through the monotony of my routine!
I expected the normal.
I anticipated so little.
I underestimated the gift because I was looking past it to the next thing.

You never know what joy is in store for you right where you are, especially if you never stop to see it.

Don't let the routine usurp the glorious in your life and don't let opportunities pass you by for you to break others out of that routine by being the bearer His glory in their life.

You and I were designed to be difference makers...and to readily expect and anticipate our Great God to make a difference IN us and THROUGH us.

Whose heart will you choose to fill?

Mamas and Daddys...let it start with us.
Be present.
Be His.
Be the difference maker in your child's life.
Moments like these will make you eternally glad that did.


"You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven."
(Matthew 5:14, 16 ESV)